Reminder: The Kids Have School

Well, Uncle Bear (my brother) got married last Friday and my entire family was included in the wedding. So, I thought there would be something to take from that for the blog this week.

As it turns out, nothing noteworthy happened at the wedding. However, the following Monday was very interesting.

It turns out the Monday afterwards was Columbus Day. Mama Bear had off from school (she teaches at a charter school in Philadelphia), so we let the kids sleep in as Cookie Bear was off from pre-school as well.

So, I was on my way out the door to get to work early so I could leave early. As I brought the yard waste to the curb on my way to the car, I noticed a bus drive by.

As it approached I thought that it was one of the Catholic School buses. I looked at the students through the windows as the bus drove by and I said to myself, "Boy that girl looks familiar."

Once the bus went by, I saw the number on the back of the bus: 10.

"Huh. That's Peanut and Junior Bear's bus," I said to myself.

Then, one of the neighbears, whose kid is on the same bus, drove by, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?"

"The kids have school today?" I questioned.

"It's not like when we were kids," she answered "They go to school on Columbus Day. The kids okay?"

"Yeah. Perfect," I said. "They are upstairs asleep. I guess we better get them up."

Anyway, fast forward about 45 minutes. As I checked the kids into school late, the nice lady at the desk asked, "What's the reason for them being late?"

"Truthfully," I answered, "I didn't think they had school today until I saw the bus ride by."

She laughed.

By the way, should I be worried that the lady knew my kids so well that as soon as we walked in the office she said hi to them by name? The school is pretty big and I wonder why she knows them so well.

When the Naughty Step Isn’t So Bad

As many of you know, I go to work in the mornings after dropping Cookie Bear off at pre-school for 9 am. This means I work later as I usually don’t get to work until 9:30-9:45. As a result, I miss dinner most nights since I don’t get home until 6-6:30.

Well, last week I had to come home early from work to relieve the sitter because Mama Bear had her “Back to School Night.” Therefore, I had to get dinner ready for the three kids.

Peanut Bear and Junior Bear, both in first grade, are good little eaters. As long as they don’t have a snack too close to meal time, they’ll eat everything in sight. Cookie Bear, well she’s a different story. See, she didn’t get her nickname because she liked vegetables.

Anyway, that night I made chicken cutlets with a side of broccoli (okay, you got me, I didn’t actually make the chicken cutlets, but I did warm them up). At first the twins moaned, but ate. Cookie Bear, well, it wasn’t that easy. Once she saw the food, she immediately started crying, saying, no yelling, “I don’t like chicken! I don’t like this (the broccoli)!”

The outburst and defiance continued for a few more minutes and when it became clear none of us were going to eat in peace, I sent her to the naughty step. A few minutes later I went to get her and explained that she had to finish everything on her plate if she wanted to join us in playing the game Trouble after dinner.

Trouble… huh…I should have seen this coming.

Anyway, as soon as she sat down, she said she was going to eat the chicken, but not the “green stuff.”

Peanut Bear tried to show her that it wasn’t that bad, even saying, “Look, I don’t like it either, but broccoli will help you grow big and strong.”

Amazing how Peanut Bear is like a little mom.

Well, Peanut and Junior Bear finished their food and went downstairs to play. I stayed with Cookie and true to her word she finished her chicken and left the broccoli. She sat there just starring at it. I reminded her she wasn’t going to be able to play Trouble if she didn’t finish it and I started to clean up.

It was at this point something incredible happened. Something I never thought in my wildest dreams would ever occur.

As I was at the sink, Cookie Bear got out of her seat and went straight to the naughty step. When I turned around and didn’t she her and then found her at the naughty step, my heart broke for just a moment.

Here was a four-year-old girl who was willing to not only give up her chance to play a game with her brother, sister and dad, but would rather sit at the naughty step voluntarily than eat her broccoli.

Unbelievable! If the Green Giant could see this now his “Yo-ho-ho” would be more like “Oh-no-no.” On the other hand, the Keebler Elves sure would’ve been proud, that’s for sure.

Think about that. Cookie Bear would rather sit by herself at the naughty step, a punishment, than eat broccoli.

Once again, I didn’t anticipate that response and was left at a loss. Why is nothing easy? Just eat the broccoli!

I told her she didn’t have to sit at the naughty step, because she didn’t do anything wrong, but she stayed there until her sister came upstairs with the game Trouble. Cookie then got off the step, but I had to stay true to my word and she wasn’t able to play.

I left the broccoli out on the table in front of her in case she changed her mind. But the strong willed little girl also stayed true to her word and 45 minutes later (let me tell you Trouble is NOT a quick game) the broccoli was still there. And she was fine with not playing the game.

I did let her have a bowl of cereal before bed because I didn’t want her to go to bed hungry, but that was it. I don’t know if that was right or wrong to do, but I have to give that little girl props. She stuck to her guns.

A week later I still can’t believe it. She would rather go to the naughty step and watch us have fun instead of eating broccoli!

Good Afternoon Babies!

There were times being a Daytime Daddy when days seemed to drag on, especially when Peanut Bear and Junior Bear were infants. The days would run into another, making almost every day seem like ground hog day.

I'm sure many of you know what I mean. The monotony of changing countless diapers and conducting seemingly endless feedings was sometimes too much to take.

At the onset of my daytime Daddy duties I was too afraid to take the kids out of the house. Actually, afraid might not be the right word. Overwhelmed might be more accurate. The thought of taking a pair of newborns anywhere, was a little much for this first-time dad.

So to pass the time at home, I took to entertaining myself, sometimes, I'll admit, this was at their expense.

Remember, I am a sports nut from north Jersey. So just about all sports fan from the New York area listen to WFAN. Well, fortunately for me, where I live in the Philadelphia area, I can listen to the station on the radio (I don't know what I would've done had I been cooped up in a house with two infants and had to listen about the Eagles all day).

Anyway, the afternoon hosts at the time were Mike Francesa and Chris Russo. The show was called 'Mike and the Mad Dog' and Russo would open the show with his patented scream and intro.

Here is an example of it that I found on Youtube...




Well, when I would wake the kids up from their afternoon nap, I would 'borrow' Russo's schtick and put my own Papa Bear spin on it. I would sneak on their room and in my best Chris Russo voice...

(start out quietly and then get louder)Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! Good afternoon babies and how are you today?! This is daddy, the time is 2 o'clock on this 5th day of June 2004 and I'll be taking you through the rest of the day until Mommy gets home at 5 o'clock and I go to work.

Now, before you think this was a form of child abuse, let me tell you the kids grew to absolutely love it. By the time I was done with my bit, they were up and jumping at the side of the crib, and it kept me humored.

Well, You Asked...

So my sister emailed Mama Bear and I recently on behalf of one of her friends who is going to be having twins. Since we lived the chaos of twins, her friend wanted to pick our collective brains about what to expect, what was needed and all that fun stuff. So, here was my response (some names were changed to protect the innocent). Let me know if it was too much. My sister thinks it was over the top. But I can tell you it's all the truth.

Dear...

The first 2 -2 1/2 years are absolute hell. I'm not just saying that to scare you -- I mean it!!!

Think about what it's like to have have one baby and now times that by two. It starts with lack of sleep, piles and piles of dirty diapers, endless amounts of bottles, creative ways to feed two babies at once (utilize the boppy), and countless trips to the doctors office (who, by the way, if he was ever on time it would be a sign of the apocalypse).

And that's the easy part!

Just when that ends, they turn into toddlers!!! Avoid this at all costs!!! Once they learn to walk, your days of leaving the house are over. Avoid teaching them to walk until they are at least 30.

One goes up the aisles, the other goes down the aisles. You now have to decide who you are going to grab first. Some argue this is life's first lesson in teaching them who you love more. Usually it's the one nearest to the sharper items (at least it was in my case). But once you get him, don't just put in him the stroller, DUCT TAPE HIM TO THE SEAT!!! Trust me when I say he will find a way out when you turn to get the other child.

Then, this one touches this, that one touches that. "No" become the word you say the most. There was one point when someone asked me if we were Japanese, because I was in the store saying "Junior No! Peanut No!" the person thought our last name was "No."

When you leave the store, you learn that your children just broke their first law and you became an accomplice to a crime, as they have that cute little toy you walked passed hidden in their stroller. You know, the toy you said he couldn't have, took from him and put back on the shelf. Well, somehow he got it back. How? I still don't know, but he did.

When you get home and want to relax, you plop in a movie. You shut your eyes for just a minute only to open them to the toy hammer being slammed on your head.

Before you know it, you're in your own house looking for your son. You go upstairs, downstairs, in the bathroom, in your room, check under beds, behind couches and then you happen to look out the window and notice he's half way up the block walking to the playground. You go to get him and when you get inside, the other one has the phone in her hand. You grab it from her and hang it up. As you are in the middle of screaming at them, the police show up at your front door. Apparently she called 911 by accident when you ran outside.

After you convince the nice officer you are a sane individual, the day is over and as you lay in bed you realize you have to do it all again tomorrow.

Only one thought got me through this. I knew one day they would have to change my diapers -- and that is going to be my ultimate revenge.

Seriously, though, congrats on having twins!!!

Papa Bear

Dinner at Papa Bear's in 10 Years

With boy/girl twins and another girl just two years younger, I can completely see this being our dinner conversation in 10 years. Enjoy.